I’ve fallen in love with a “wimmin’s music” song that I hated when I was a twenty-something lesbian in the 1980s.
Almost a quarter-century has passed since I heard lesbian folksinger Ferron sing “Shadows on a Dime,” but the song plays over and over in my mind lately. I used to find the song depressing. Now it feeds my spirituality and seems haunting and true, probably because I am in the position that Ferron sings about:
I'm looking backward down the track
To see us dreamers in our prime.
I remember when I bought the Ferron cassette tape in 1984 in the tiny women’s bookstore in my hometown of Iowa City. I was living in Japan and came home for a visit. My partner and our other American friends gave me long shopping lists of hard-to-find items that I was supposed to buy for them while I was in the States. Ferron’s “Shadows on a Dime” was on my partner’s list, and I tracked it down at the hole-in-the-wall women’s bookstore. No doubt that store is long gone, like most of the other women’s bookstores.
My partner loved that Ferron tape and played it over and over despite my objections that it was gloomy. The meandering, almost tuneless melodies became etched in my mind against my will. Time passed, we moved to California, the tape broke. Lesbian feminist women stopped calling themselves “wimmin” (coined because we didn’t want anything to do with “men”)… but I never forgot the song. And I grew to love it.
Today I longed to hear “Shadows on a Dime” for real, so I looked it up on Google. Wow, now I can watch Ferron singing it on video! I can buy an updated version on her new album BoulderA place for LGBTQ spirituality and the arts. Home of the gay Jesus and queer saints. Uniting body, mind and spirit. Open to all. Renamed Q Spirit blog and moved to Qspirit.net in 2017.
Saturday, September 20, 2008
A lesbian looks back at wimmin’s music
I’ve fallen in love with a “wimmin’s music” song that I hated when I was a twenty-something lesbian in the 1980s.
Almost a quarter-century has passed since I heard lesbian folksinger Ferron sing “Shadows on a Dime,” but the song plays over and over in my mind lately. I used to find the song depressing. Now it feeds my spirituality and seems haunting and true, probably because I am in the position that Ferron sings about:
I'm looking backward down the track
To see us dreamers in our prime.
I remember when I bought the Ferron cassette tape in 1984 in the tiny women’s bookstore in my hometown of Iowa City. I was living in Japan and came home for a visit. My partner and our other American friends gave me long shopping lists of hard-to-find items that I was supposed to buy for them while I was in the States. Ferron’s “Shadows on a Dime” was on my partner’s list, and I tracked it down at the hole-in-the-wall women’s bookstore. No doubt that store is long gone, like most of the other women’s bookstores.
My partner loved that Ferron tape and played it over and over despite my objections that it was gloomy. The meandering, almost tuneless melodies became etched in my mind against my will. Time passed, we moved to California, the tape broke. Lesbian feminist women stopped calling themselves “wimmin” (coined because we didn’t want anything to do with “men”)… but I never forgot the song. And I grew to love it.
Today I longed to hear “Shadows on a Dime” for real, so I looked it up on Google. Wow, now I can watch Ferron singing it on video! I can buy an updated version on her new album BoulderWednesday, September 10, 2008
Novels show Jesus from the heart
by Trudie Barreras
A deep deprivation that I think current believers have experienced is the failure of our spiritual guides to help us to open up to this heart knowledge. In essence, along with the conflict between science and religion, we have tended to boil everything down to creeds and dogmatic assertions, none of which actually speak to the reality of life as we know it. Also, there is a complete failure to truly experience Jesus as both divine and human. Most especially, in this era of obsession with sexuality, which the churches demonize and the secular world worships, there is a complete refusal to deal with the possibility of the human aspect of Jesus as a sexual being.
Two authors whose works I have read and re-read since January of 2008 deal with this problem in powerful novels. They are Anne Rice, author of Christ the Lord: Out of Egypt: A NovelAlthough the works are very different in some ways, they are marvelously similar in others. I will share some brief reflections on each to illustrate my thoughts, although I don’t want to go into so much detail that I would “spoil the stories” for anyone who hasn’t read them.
Rice’s first book, meticulously researched from a historical perspective, has to infer a great deal about the way the child Jesus perhaps grew into an awareness of his human/divine nature from very few scriptural clues. I believe she has accomplished a remarkable explication of “how it might have been”, and her story drew me totally into context in which Jesus might have begun to discover his calling. The story is poignant, beautiful, and one I wanted to share with a number of friends and family. Her second book deals with some major cultural factors that might indeed have led Jesus to his “revolutionary” rejection of the legalism and moral judgmentalism of the Jewish culture of his time. Her story begins with the description of what is essentially a “gay bashing” of two innocent young boys, and proceeds to discuss the near destruction of a beautiful young girl because her father thinks she has been “dishonored”. In both her books, Rice describes the difficulties Jesus might have encountered because of the “questionable” manner of his conception and birth. Her perception brings into clear focus the difficulties posed by legalistic attitudes that insist God is more concerned about justice than mercy.Cherry in essence begins where Rice’s narrative ends, that is, with Jesus going into the wilderness after his baptism in the Jordan, the calling of the disciples, and the marriage at Cana. Cherry’s primary objective is to depict Jesus as fully human in terms of sexuality, while maintaining, as Rice does, that Jesus was not genitally sexually active. Her rational for this, which I find marvelously sensitive and cogent, is that Jesus realizes his divine nature would inevitably produce an “imbalance of power” that would not permit the full and free interaction of “consenting adults” which sanctifies all human sexual interaction. Jesus also recognizes, in Cherry’s vision, that he is “married” to the Holy Spirit. After his Resurrection, the consummation of this marriage will in essence allow him to be married to every believer, and to the entire Church, a theme that surfaces powerfully in the Epistles.
I believe that Cherry’s descriptions of the eroticism between Jesus and various of his followers are beautifully and tastefully handled. Most important, I believe her writing truly sanctifies sexual love. I have been waiting a long time for someone to put into such powerful terms a truth that I’ve long felt but have been personally unable to articulate. I have been extremely uneasy that in the years since the “sexual revolution” began – years when Lady Chatterley's Lover
I recently shared with Kittredge, and she featured on her Jesus In Love blog, a photograph of my “Nursing Madonna” statuette, and the story about the way in which Mary’s “nudity” was covered up with a Kleenex poncho by some member of the First MCC of Atlanta congregation when I put the statue on display in our meditation chapel. This is, indeed, exactly what I hope that Cherry’s wonderful novels will eventually counteract – a degree of prudishness that fails to deal with the true reality of Jesus as God With Us and the Holy Spirit as the “Beloved” who marries us to our true nature as a community of loving believers in Christ.
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Trudie Barreras is a writer and a member of First Metropolitan Community Church of Atlanta. She may be contacted by e-mail at: tbarreras@bellsouth.net.
Tuesday, August 26, 2008
How do GLBT folks fit into Buddhism?
A lesbian Buddhist friend recently asked me for tips on how to “fill the void” between Buddhists and lesbian and gay people when she gave a speech at a Buddhist conference. Her impression was that the Buddhists had little connection to GLBT folks. It's true that GLBT Buddhists are not as visible as gay, lesbian, bi and trans folks who follow Christ. GLBT Christians have had to come together and speak out because conservative Christians are directly attacking us, singling us out as the worst sinners, using the issue of homosexuality to raise money, etc. It appears, at least within American Buddhism, that Buddhists are more tolerant about homosexuality. However, reality is more complex. I shared the following four concepts with my friend, and I will post them here for discussion. I want to emphasize that I honor Buddhism and its followers, even though I consider myself Christian. Comments from all perspectives are welcome. 1. Like Christianity, Buddhism can be used to support homophobia There are definitely GLBT Buddhists in America, and some tend to have an idealized view of Buddhism. In our conversations, some blame Christianity for patriarchy, male dominance, and war. (Discrimination against lesbians and gays is part of sexism and patriarchy.) They're surprised when I say that in Japan I heard Buddhism used to justify male dominance and war. Maybe the critical experience is conversion -- if you were raised Christian or in a Christian culture, converting to Buddhism is a fresh start and a chance to build your own spirituality. If you were raised Buddhist, then Christianity can set you free. Here is an excerpt from an email on this subject that I sent to Toby Johnson, a gay author, activist and friend. He's a follower of Buddhism, although he once told me he is "as much a heretic to Buddhism as I am to Christianity." *** In Japan Buddhism was and is used to support male dominance. Their native animistic, goddess-oriented spirituality, Shinto, was used to justify World War II aggression against Korea and China (maybe Thailand, too). The horrors equaled some of those perpetrated in the name of Christ. My point is that any religion can be abused. It's not that any particular religion is "good." All religions have the potential to benefit society if they are practiced with "good" intentions…. I do think that Buddhism has a special role to play in America now. It seems to have a very positive effect on some people who grew up Christian or Jewish, and became disillusioned with their original religion. For example, some people can't access Jesus' message of love if they were saturated from birth with destructive Christian dogma. Buddhism gives them a fresh start with God. In Japan, I found that the opposite was true. I met quite a few Japanese feminists who rejected Buddhism because of its history of patriarchal oppression in their society and in their own personal experience. They found Christianity to be fresh and liberating. That was the atmosphere in which I chose to be baptized into Christianity in 1983 at an interdenominational English-speaking church in Kobe, Japan. Our church had members from all over the world. *** 2. Gay consciousness can be integrated with Buddhism Great info on how to integrate gay consciousness with Buddhism can be found at Toby Johnson’s website. Toby is a psychologist and former monk who studied myth with Joseph Campbell. Here's an excerpt from his site: "Johnson champions the Mahayana Buddhist World-savior myth of the Bodhisattva Avalokiteshvara which portrays a lovely, androgynous (gay-like) young man, usually shown barechested in a relaxed meditation pose, who saves the world by willingly taking upon himself, out of compassion and kindness, all the incarnations of all sentient beings to free those beings from suffering. All human beings are incarnations of this one single Being (a mythological version of the planetary mind Gaia)." 3. Affirmation vs. tolerance of GLBT experience I'm sure that there are many varieties of Buddhism, but do most of them actually affirm GLBT people? I haven't found much pro-active affirmation for GLBT people in Buddhist teachings or teachers. A case in point is a lecture that I attended at the Gay and Lesbian Center in Los Angeles a few years ago. Lesbian pop singer k.d. lang introduced her Tibetan lama Chödak Gyatso Nubpa to discuss GLBT sexuality. His basic message was: We're all sinners, and the sin of homosexuality is no worse than other sins. This is the same message preached by many Christians. The lama also emphasized that he had taken a vow of celibacy, so for him all sex was bad. If a Catholic priest had given the same speech at the Center, there would have been a riot, but somehow it was acceptable to hear it from a Tibetan lama. 4. Buddhism may focus on oneness more than on unique GLBT gifts Gay and lesbian Buddhists tend to focus on oneness and see the particularity of their sexual orientation as largely irrelevant. At least that’s my experience. On the other hand, people who pursue "gay spirituality" emphasize that GLBT people have a unique experience and/or role that is valuable to the greater whole. A debate about "gay spirituality" versus "everybody spirituality" has generated a flood of comments at the Jesus in Love Blog. Here are excerpts that relate it to Buddhism from Toby Johnson's comments at the blog: *** "Having a different kind of consciousness of sexual attraction and living differently from the "norm" encourages certain talents and skills. One of those skills is the ability to see through the assumptions of conventional society. This shows up in "camp" humor and irony. Gay people tend to be able to step outside what everybody else takes for granted and see through it. That can also be understood as seeing from a broader perspective, i.e., seeing the "bigger picture." … What I think "gay spirituality" means is bringing our "gay talents" to the area of religion…. It is a great skill--one pleasing to "God," I think--to be able to rise above your religious opinions and see through to something higher and more subtle (this is what the Buddhists call Enlightenment). It is a "gift from God" that gay people get to be skilled at this. *** In closing, I repeat that I honor Buddhists and the Buddhist path. Perhaps surprisingly, GLBT Buddhists seem to be some of the most enthusiastic supporters of my gay-Jesus books and websites. I am writing from my limited perspective as an appreciative outsider to Buddhism, and I welcome comments from others with different viewpoints. May the discussion enlighten everyone!
P.S. After I originally posted this, I discovered that others are also blogging lately about Buddhism and homosexuality. The Buddhist Blog does an excellent job of explaining Buddhist sexual ethics -- including the Dalai Lama’s less-than-enlightened statements on gay and lesbian sexuality. Don’t miss the great comments! The Saint Sinner Shiksa Blog offers a more personal account on “Is there something in particular that attracts homosexual women to Buddhism?” Thanks, Riverwolf, for introducing these blogs!
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Gay spirituality vs. everybody spirituality: A new closet?

Gay spirituality may be replaced by “everybody spirituality. ” That’s an important idea that emerged during a recent gay spirituality weekend in New Mexico. Guest speakers included gay author Toby Johnson and Franciscan priest Richard Rohr.
One of the organizers was gay artist Peter Grahame, who sends this report:
“The Spirituality weekend here in Albuquerque at the end of April '08 went well. We had 30 or so for the dialogue Friday evening between Toby and Richard; the audience participated and it was quite a discussion. The retreat on Saturday and half of Sunday was attended by 18 people or so, and it was very good; Toby offered much information that many found really very helpful and inspiring.
But as it turns out, we learned from this whole thing that the trend seems to be away from 'Gay Spirituality' to 'Everybody Spirituality.' Apparently, there may be many GLBT people these days, especially among the young, who don't seem to want to be labeled anything. Of course we're all equal. And nobody is trying to say we should be 'separate' or that we're 'better' at all. But many, especially the young GLBT people, don't seem to want to recognize their unique gifts – especially their unique spiritual gifts; a unique spiritual point of view that I believe comes with being GLBT. Again, these unique gifts don't make us 'special' or 'superior,' but they are unique, different, and these gifts are much needed.
Maybe some Straight people have gifts like these, too, but to me, not in quite the same way. I agree with Toby that by just wanting to be, or appear to be, just like everybody else... to want to assimilate... well, it seems like a subtle way of just going back in the closet. There are GLBT folks who say, 'We're just like everybody else except for what we do in bed,' but even causal observation shows that just isn't true. And yet, oddly, at the same time, these GLBT folks can still be very much involved in highly visible Gay Pride activities. Go figure.
In the end, the real point is, as I think Toby keeps saying, that GLBT people do have particular spiritual gifts to offer the development of religion as we head further into the 21st century. Well, anyway, that's not the end of the discussion, I've only touched on a few ideas here, and I applaud you, Kitt, for wanting to open it up for more. Thanks.”
Peter has just launched a gorgeous new website, Ironic-Horse.com, which highlights his book Contemplations of the Heart: A Book of Male Spirit.
I found it especially helpful to hear about the trend from gay spirituality to everybody spirituality. My partner and I have experienced this attitude with younger GLBT people and been puzzled and saddened by it. Now I see that, like it or not, it’s part of a larger social context. Maybe it’s even a sign that the GLBT rights movement has succeeded.
Has anybody else run into this attitude of “inclusiveness” that threatens to water down or gloss over the unique characteristics of gay and lesbian spirituality? Or if you think it’s time to move beyond the “gay” label, can you explain why?
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Homoerotic Jesus T-shirt found -- what fun!

A homoerotic baptism of Christ T-shirt caught the eye of a New York blogger -- and made me laugh when I read his account. Here’s his story, reposted by permission from the fourfour blog.
“The fact stands that Wildwood, NJ, can still turn out a hell of a T-shirt. Witness the best T-shirt in the history of them. OMG, you are so jealous of me and my homoerotic baptism of Christ decal. I wanted this on black, and the girl was going to do it, but her Middle Eastern boss was like, "Will not show. For male, white or gray." I compromised with pink. No one seemed amused. Whatever. It's the best T-shirt in history. I dare you to present a better one. You have already failed. The Bible says it, I believe it, that settles it!”
Need we say more? As I wrote in the introduction to my book Art That Dares: Gay Jesus, Woman Christ, and More: “Certain scenes from the life of Jesus have fired queer imaginations, [including] the male-on-male water-play of Jesus’ baptism...”
A special thanks to Rich Juzwiak of the fourfour blog for sharing his story here. Visit his blog to read the many comments from others who admired the gay Jesus T-shirt, plus his truly scary photos of an amusement park not far from the T-shirt shop in south Jersey.

